Cock Yo Head Left
So this morning I woke up and went to church.
And I was scared as hell.
3 blocks from Nani’s house in Pasadena waited MOSAIC – Pasadena. Erwin, Hip Hop, Vibe, The whole show.
Here was my morning…
Now as I said in the video. I KNOW this is not just a Mosaic thing. It was One Sunday morning. One location. One visitor.
But I KNOW there are people in my home who feel the same way. And it saddens me. We can have the slickest production, best music, best preaching, and sexiest media director in the world, but if no one says “Hey man. My name is…”, then WE HAVE LOST. There are no excuses. At least not at my church.
So this week. Find the fat bald dude standing alone. If he smells. Hold your breath. If he has a tick, look at his feet. If he talks your ear off. Listen.
How’s your church doing at it?
Los
RAIN IT DOWN
Yeah Yeah we have lived in Wichita for 3 years now…and have been alone. Not to say that there aren’t any Christians….But it is crazy. Where is the love? Not here. We just started attending a Evengelical Free Church and they are super friendly, but have yet to see what the small groups are like…so we will see.
i went to a different church today – i knew a few people (it was another one of our campuses but like an hour away)…i was nervous too. it was out in the country so i got some country love. my internet is crap so i only saw the first few moments of your vid – will try it later.
by today i meant yesterday….so sleepy…..
Im not convinced that not being aproached on your first visit is a problem. Many people (and churches) will give a guy his space to allow him to feel out the surroundings. Now if a parent is standing around obviously looking for the 3rd grade class then someone should definately step up. Last night at Burning House I busted up to a bunch of teenagers I had never met and said hey, and they just stood there staring at me like I was the ghost of Chris Farley!
Anyway, good stuff man … keep doing the 007 spy vid thing, I digs it!
We just moved to Columbus, OH from SoCal – been trying a new church for the last month or so here. People have been really friendly. Plenty of signs / etc to tell us where to take the kids and all that.
Dang it…I just re-read that, and I didn’t mean to sound cynical…sorry.
Los,
To borrow a phrase, that video as convicting as hell, man. Thanks for taking a risk. Helped me get my head right. Keep it up.
I think it is different in different areas. Anf For Sure with groups. Even more with groups of kids.groups already feel somewhat safe. But there are plenty of loners out there who I am convinced feel the shaft. I think what gets me more is when the church staff “ahem” cliques together like we have not seen each other all week. Oh. And if you tilt the laptop you don’t have to cock yo head left.
Los
…i sometimes get scared as hell going to my own church…
i do agree with you…our church is still small yet there are times i see the leadership hanging out and leaving others out…(be like christ?…hmm)
A secret shopper can tell us a lot about our church, maybe some things that we don’t want to take a good, hard look at. I don’t care what kind of church it is: A home group, a small country church at the edge of a wheat field, or a big inner city church with somebody as hip as ‘Los as the music pastor. If a visitor doesn’t feel welcome the first time through the door, chances are they won’t be back. What a tragedy.
“e can have the slickest production, best music, best preaching, and sexiest media director in the world,’”
I would like to add sexy and friendly media director. please email me at justinmk@gmail.com
Wow, my guess is here in our So Cal culture we all need to work on this. We have to constantly be talking about it for our meetings on campus. Our students use it as a “friend” time when our whole purpose in being there is sharing the gospel. I confess it’s always easier for me to try to connect with the students I already know rather than meet the new ones coming in. Sometimes I even use the “staff” excuse saying it’s a good time for me to check in or grab time with the girls I disciple. We should all try this once in a while to remember what it feels like to be new. Interesting thought, we are church goers … imagine how someone just checking out spiritual things would feel even more like an outsider.
what’s crazy is that i think most church-goers think that greeting and befriending the loner is the leadership teams job or “don’t they have a committee for that?” kind of thing. I love the way louie giglio says, “church isn’t about you”
Thanks for the conviction. Really made me realize that I am guilty of this a lot. We can lead worship from the stage, but if relationships are not built, then, like you said, we have lost.
Los,
Enjoyed the video. Fun idea. I do think it can be different with different groups. It seems to me like it is especially difficult with younger crowds at times.
I had a great time visiting Sandals a week ago, and haven’t had time to post about it yet, but the nature of this post seemed like a great place to share a piece of my experience. This is one of the most important things I look for in a church. Just for the record, you guys aren’t doing so bad. When I walked in the door the greeters at the door all said hi and were very friendly.
I do have to admit though, when we were out front kinda lookin around beforehand, and for a bit inside after the service, we weren’t approached at all. i figured this was the case for 2 main reasons though. 1) It was Sunday night which seems to be a younger crowd. They probably don’t think this way as much and maybe we don’t look as young as I like to think. 2) I was with my wife and a friend, so maybe we didn’t look loner enough. I did start some great conversations also, though.
Had a great time and loved the service! Was fun sayin hi to you as well. Keep up the good work!
Thanks Bobby.
I still have a hard time with this. I am not sure where to start or how to approach this. I am not “new” to Sandals, but it still feels like I am. I sing, I am involved, but often I still sit by myself during service. Not to say that I am not ok with this. But I feel that the time when I meet the most people is in the bathroom. I definitely would have to say I have met some of the friendliest people here at Sandals, it’s just the process in meeting them that takes awhile.
But I need to do my part too. For instance, this last Sunday (in the bathroom), my friend Wendy was talking with this girl. They were talking like they knew eachother for a long time. I don’t know because I still don’t know a lot of people. So I had figured that she had been coming to Sandals for awhile and I never ended up being introduced. So, anyways, after the serivce, we ran into her again…well, through the last conversation, I had found out it had been her first time. I felt so bad for not having talked with her, I had just assumed. And we all know what assuming does! lol. So, my lesson was, don’t be shy, and to involve myrself even if I seem like the outsider. Because we all know what it feels like to be the new one. And it can be an awkward place.
I’m a worship leader at my church and I “get to be seen” all the time. This past Sunday, before service, I walked up to a buddy of mine, shook hands, blabbed a bit and was going to go “do my thing.” I stopped when I saw a person I did not recognize. I walked up and intro’d myself, he intro’d himself, and then I ask how long he’s been coming out to our church…
To my surprise, he said “about a year.”
?!?!??!??!?!?!??!!!!
Of course, I can’t meet and greet everyone, and I guess I am at fault for not making the effort every Sunday, but to miss this guy for a whole year?!?!?!
Crikey.
Our church is generally a very friendly church. We make it a point to have a “trained” greeter team to ID and direct new folks so our visitors might be able to sense that connection is easier than they might have thought before walking through the front door. We also have the occasional built-in time during service where our pastor will “groupletize” — during sermon — for quick intros and then engage in a brief, but directed discussion about whatever topic that morning.
We try hard (perhaps not hard enough) to foster interaction and connection. I’d love to hear your ideas about what you do, or how you connect with visitors.
Quick story… our pastor set the congregation up one Sunday with a buddy of mine posed as a bum one cold morning. He was asked to linger around the front of the church. Pastor wanted to rebuke our congregation for not loving the homeless and yada yada yada… but he couldn’t.
Our greeter team went out of the way to help him feel welcome, invited him in out of the cold, offered coffee, etc. Pastor was blown away, pleasantly surprised, and blessed by the kindness exhibited by our congregation as a whole!
My buddy, who had been attending another church (but floundering) decided to join our church after his experience — he was blown away too!
We just need to get back to the basics and just love on people, eh?
Great post, Los.
You just answered a question I’ve been wrestling with for weeks now. Thanks!
My neck hurts.
I help set-up at Sandals and just had a conversation about this very topic. I have to make one sad comment. Los- you and I haven’t said hello or good morning to each other in nearly one and a half year’s worth of Sundays.
I will make one sadder comment.
Who are you?
Los
P.S. Let\’s break the streak. You know where to find me. Big bald brown dude with guitar
Well, if it makes you feel any better about action being taken, your video was shown at the 2007 Leadership Advance, Mosaic’s annual gathering of all the volunteer staff. Was kind of funny when it first came on–Christina and I were like “Hey, that looks a lot like Carlos. . . It IS Carlos.” And then there we were: caught between our two churches. What I don’t get is that Erwin said he found the video on YouTube. I think your criticism and undercover action are fully justified, but why didn’t the Mosaic staff here about it after the fact from you? I don’t know the whole story here, but Tammy did tell me once that the McManuses and the Browns are not strangers. If this is a problem for the church in general, why is the church in general finding out about itself through random web browsing? Just wondering what’s going on–and really really hoping the people of influence here aren’t going to devolve into myopic conflict.
I really enjoy the article post. Really Great.