How Sucky I Am, How Lucky I Am
As I am walking out the door this morning –
“Carlos!!! Don’t you want to pray?”
In my rush to get on with the days “tasks” I had forgotten to hold my wife and pray. So we did. A quick one. But effective none the less. Love and kisses were dispensed to the women of the Whittaker domain.
Around lunch time –
“Hey Carlos. I just got off the phone with Holt. (My heart skips a beat.) They said that Korea still has not recieved our i-600 form from the department of homeland security.”
“Well what does that mean?” (very sarcastic tone)
“It means just another roadblock in the way of bringing him home.”
“So WHY did you tell me that you were pretty sure it was THIS week?!?”
“I just assumed babe?”
“Yea. But now it will take another few weeks! At this rate we’ll never go. Bye.”
Click
Is it not amazing what work Satan can do inside your heart? Here is my wife who has worked her ass off to make this adoption happen, and I just bite her head off. Like she sabotaged it or something. I suck. I am pissed. I am angry. I just want to go get him. And in the midst of the beauty that is adoption, I get selfish.
So I go home to apologize in person. Around 2. I feel like %#@$. She accepts my apology and bitch slaps me. Just kidding. She looks at me in the imperfect state I am constantly in and says…
“Soon”
So I run upstairs to steal a smack down from my girls before I head back to work. They tackle me. I laugh. Sohaila looks at me and asks…
“What’s wrong daddy?”
“I just want to go get your brother baby”
“You will daddy. But right now you can play with me.”
So simple. Yet so true. Instead of bitching and moaning about the child I don’t have yet, why not love and kiss the ones I have.
Then as Sohaila turns to run back into her pink room full of flowers, her cast catches me right in the forehead.
Ow.
Los
RAIN IT DOWN
I am sure at some point in her life she will want to smack you up side the head.
Your blog reaches a lot of people…how about posting to see if someone knows someone with ties to homeland security. Just a thought, praying for your departure and his smooth arrival.
Tunz
wow, that made my heart pitter pat. love you guys and the realness and devotion to your family and marriage.
amazing.
my dad works in management for tsa. not that he can do anything, but i never get stopped in the USA for random checks if that means something.
You said bitch slap! That’s awesome. One of my closest friends and his wife are adopting two boys out of Uganda have been dealing with the same $%@&. As a dude who was adopted, and now a father who has adopted, THANK YOU. It IS beautiful, and all this will soon just be a chapter in your own “adoption story”. And by the way, I do work for DHS, but your application is in the hands of God and some nameless GS-5 clerk. Our God is bigger.