My Son Is Two, Her Son Is Two
It is days like today that I think of her.
And I know, she is thinking of you.
She is wondering what you are doing.
She is wondering how you are.
I am wondering what she is doing.
I am wondering how she is.
Today is the day that my heart is so full it is about to pound out of my chest.
Today is a day that her heart may be deflated and in need of filling.
Today we are going to eat some cake and you are going to watch American Gladiator reruns on my lap.
Today she will probably eat some kimchi and pray that you are taken care of.
Today I will speak to you in English.
Today she will remember you in Korean.
So you know what son?
I am going to make you a promise.
For as long as I can call you mine, we will remember her.
We will remember the bravest lady in the world who allowed her life to become incomplete in order for my life to become complete.
I am going to spill tears on the back of your head as I let you fall asleep on my chest tonight.
And I will think of her.
Because in a really strange way,
I love her just as much as I love you.
Happy Birthday Losiah.
Daddy
RAIN IT DOWN
Happy Birthday Losiah!
Beautiful post Los.
Happy Birthday Losiah! Hopefully someday you will play with LynnMarie (when we get to go bring her home from China). Ready for another round of two-year-old-dom Los?
Beautiful post – and Happy Birthday, Losiah! I can’t wait to meet you!
Happy Birthday Losiah!! They grow up so fast. I remember when you guys brought him home and met up with us at CPK at the plaza and I got to hold him for the first time with his little bald head, sucking on his two fingers! awww, he looked just like his daddy.
The deepest love.
Happy Birthday, beautiful boy!
As I said on twitter, bless you and your heart. As a birth mother, this post hits me on so many levels. Your son is blessed. Happy Birthday to your son. My heart celebrates with your family and mourns with her.
Blessings abound for all in different ways.
I needed to hear from someone so in love today – bless Losiah and his mother in Korea and his daddy and mom living in the ATL. He’ll be a good man.
Praying God’s blessings on Losiah’s birth mommy, his now family and the little guy himself. And praying for his mama to find Jesus. Imagine–a reunion for all of you in heaven!
Happy birthday to Losiah and to the two families who love him!
Happy Birthday little guy! And God bless Losiah’s birth mother, and thank the Lord for his awesome earthly parents.
From one adoptive parent to another — I so get this post, these feelings.
Thank you for sharing these with us.
Thank you.
Love that!
We also think of our son’s first mom a lot on his birthday!:)jamie
los
Thanks for the kind words aobut losiahs birth mom and your authentic love toward him. As an adoptee….it means a lot.
Loran
Happy Birthday Losiah.
Wonderful post Carlos. Too often the birth mother gets a bad rap, gets forgotten, gets painted as evil – we need to lift them up for their selfless acts and the love they have for their children.
Thanks…
beautiful words, carlos. beautiful words.
happy birthday losiah!
I wish every birth mother could read this and know so many appreciate the sacrifice that was made on her part. It deeply moving and beautiful.
Happiest of birthdays to Losiah!!
My kids, who also are Korean, turned 17 and 19 yesterday. They were two, I blinked, and there you go.
From the moment our children arrived, their mothers and families have been in my thoughts and prayers. My kids own all the decisions about search and reunion now, but I will never, EVER lose hope that someday, someway, they will all be reunited.
Thank you thank you thank you for saying out loud what so many folks just don’t seem to get: Our children have two mothers and two fathers.
that was beautiful. well said.
Thank you for sharing this. I have a desire to adopt one day. This is beautiful and moved me deeply.
Beautiful…
Happy Birthday, Losiah!
You put into words what I feel for my children and their birth mothers on every birthday and family day. It is a day of joy and of grief.
Happy birthday precious baby boy! I love you and miss you MORE than you even know! I hope today is a blessing lil Los. This FlipFlops teacher misses you like crazy.
Oh my word, Carlos, this is beautiful–
As FireMom said, this post was particularly riveting for me as a birthmother. Thank you for taking time to recognize the tremendous sacrifice Losiah’s birthmother made. Thank you for helping him recognize how much he is loved by multiple families–those that share his genes and those that don’t. Blessings on your precious family and hers.
tears to my eyes. thank you!
happy birthday, losiah!
los, just curious – is internet filtered or censored in Korea? Is she (Losiah’s birth-mom) able to login and check out your site often?
Yes. I’ve have thought these same things, but never could I so eloquently express them. More than anything, I pray our daughter’s birth mother knows how much she is loved and appreciated, and how much we love our daughter.
My son is Ethiopian. I get this. I really get this. We just had his first birthday, and I spilled some tears.
Carlos. . .This is beautiful! Happy Birthday Losiah!!
Absolutely beautiful. I can totally relate.
Just amazing.
Your beautiful words blessed me!
Thank you, this was absolutely beautiful.
Happy Birthday Losiah!
Los,
I’ve got a non-biological child as well. This really hit my heart.
OK, now I’m tearing up. That was beautiful. Happy Birthday Losiah!
all i can say is wow…just, wow…
BEAUTIFUL.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY LOSIAH!!!!!!!!!!
I’m sniffling here and trying not to look like I’m crying at my laptop (while someone sits just two feet away). Beautifully written and heartwrenching. I’m an adoptive mom and these sentiments touch my soul, ringing so true in my heart. Wonderfully poignant, indeed.
And Losiah? Happy Birthday little man!
Happy birthday Losiah…..Eva just turned one march 28th and had the same thoughts
That’s awesome!
That is so amazing– exactly how we feel about our son’s first mom but have never been able to put into words, at least not as eloquently as you just did. I choked back tears last week as he turned one. I watched him eat his cake and kept asking silently, “Are you really my son? Do you really live here with us? Do we really get to be your parents?” And of course, no thought like that is ever alone. It is always accompanied by grief and empathy for the woman who lives a few hours from here without her son on his first birthday.
I didn’t understand at first what you were saying. Maybe because it is 6 in the morning. But then I got it and it broke my heart. I am on the other side of your prayer, 24 years later, without knowing. I blogged about it a couple weeks ago:
http://meyersonthehood.blogspot.com/2008/03/birthday-prayer.html
Thanks for writing this and giving me hope
Wow – That was really beautiful… Happy Birthday to Losiah!
I love this…I got choked up reading it. My sister gave her son up for adoption so I know that it’s hard on birthdays for the birth mom. I think it’s amazing that you love and respect her. Awesome
Happy Belated Birthday, little man.
That’s like the sweetest thing I’ve ever read.
You just made me cry.
Which is not hard to do, but still.
I loved your poem to your son. How unselfish of you to think of his birth mother on his birthday. I had to read this to my husband and the only thing he could say was WOW. He was amazed on how you caputured the feeling of Losiah and where he came from.
We are adopting from Russia…so it was a very touching to read this. Wonderful writing!!!
I loved your poem to your son. How unselfish of you to think of his birth mother on his birthday. I had to read this to my husband and the only thing he could say was WOW. He was amazed on how you caputured the feeling of Losiah and where he came from.
We are adopting from Russia…so it was a very touching to read this. Wonderful writing!!!
beautiful. I’m holding back tears as I read this. Happy Birthday Losiah!
thank you and your family for your unconditional love… as a korean-american, i came to this country with my family and birth parents, but along the way… i’ve met and made many friends who are korean-americans through adoption…
so on behalf of all of us koreans, thank you for your love to reach out to the other side of the world to bring joy and life into the lives of so many children who just need someone to love them…
knowing how taboo adoption is in korea, it used to break my heart that korean kids would have to leave all that they knew to go live in foreign countries all over the world… i used to be so angry that koreans would not adopt, or be ashamed of having to do so and try so hard to cover it up…
but God has given me so much peace and gratitude for all of the lives that were given new opportunities at love and happiness… because of families like you…
thank you for stepping up to love your children… and thank you for having a heart that breaks for a mother who undoubtedly remembers the beautiful baby you hold in your arms today…