You’re Not All That And Neither Am I
When you leave something you love, it is always messy.
Always.
I left my life over a year ago.
Sandals Church is my heart beat.
It still is.
You can’t birth something like that and it not be in your blood.
So when I left, I cried.
I cried like the sissy that I am.
I also talked.
I talked like the sissy that I am.
I said things like…”I’m finally able to be who God created me to be.”
I said things like…”I finally feel like I am not being held back”
And you know what.
Those are true.
But what I did not say were these things…
“I’m finally free to be who God intended me to be because I get to start fresh without the wounds I placed on other peoples souls”
“I’m finally able to be who God intended me to be because I am finally living a fully obedient life as opposed to the life I did not lead for so long while I was learning to minister at Sandals.”
Why should those statements matter?
Because in the thick of it all, Sandals Church hung on to me 567 times longer than they should have.
I would have fired myself 634 times if I was in charge.
At 22,23,24,25,26 and so on.
But instead, Matt and Nathan were examples of this.
I am a living, breathing example of People of the Second Chance.
And because of their willingness to hold my hand as we figured it all out, I am EXACTLY where I am supposed to be.
At Buckhead Church helping lead this community into a growing relationship with Jesus Christ (while teaching them to be real with themselves, others, and God 
).
So.
Heed this.
Wherever you are.
You are only there because of God’s graciousness and some human’s tolerance.
And I’m not writing this just out of sort of props I feel Sandals is due.
I want the world to know that in spite of the effed up human being I was/am, Sandals gave me an opportunity to minister inside of that.
And I tell you this…
Before you kick that stupid, lazy, self righteous, porn watching, truth spinning, egocentric 20 something year old kid to the curb, look in the mirror and thank God your last church didn’t take your own advice.
Keep it real.
It’s better that way.
Los
RAIN IT DOWN
Maybe the best thing you have ever posted. So much truth.
Wow. Great stuff. So true.
Los….
I was thinking about this very thing today. Must be somethin the Holy Ghost is sayin to His worship leaders. I feel like I am on the verge of breakdown, and perhaps the unloveliest I have ever felt… yet God continues to encourage and use me. I have no words. His grace really is what they say…amazing.
Thanks for this post.
really good stuff man. you have a gift at putting my thinking back in my own box sometimes and it's a little uncomfortable… really good stuff.
I'm a 'long time reader' but not much of a commenter. Wanted to say something about this though, as I had a friend recently who WAS 'kicked to the curb' by her church, and it really hurts to see how much damage that has done to her. She was asked to be on staff at her church, then basically kicked to the curb when a sin from BEFORE she was a Christian (which she has completely repented of, and been healed from) came to light. The whole experience has really scarred her.
sissy.
Not just a call to examine our motives toward other stupid people. But a call to examine our own lives. It shouldn't take a cross-country (cross-state, cross town) move to get right with God. It's easier because we get to start without the junk. But how much stronger would we all be if we worked through the junk.
Done the cross-country thing. But you pick up new junk wherever you go. That's where I think I am. Working through new junk. And thanking God (and humans) for using me anyway.
Duly noted. Thanks for the transparency. This is a fantastic post.
Great post, I needed this today. Thanks Los!
I hear you bro. My heart resonates with yours. May we never forget where we came from. May we never take God's daily grace for granted. And may we be generous as we give It to others.
Thanks Carlos for the reminder. How true!
aw, i miss you guys. losiah is so big, i can't believe it… and seanna, we just got your christmas card and she is so sassy …and sohaila, she's you! ahhh, can't wait to see you guys again
Awesome post my friend! Really deep
Just the words I needed to hear today. You give me hope for myself. Thank you!!!
i like your blatant honesty.
i like your blatant honesty. its beautifully raw and painful to read. and it speaks so much to me. i've often thanked God for the trials He has allowed in my life to keep me humble…coz i'm ms. know-it-all sometimes.
LOL i can't help it..i was born the eldest!
keep it up!
whoa, straight talk, not sh**, thank you.
It's always better when leaders are monument's to God's grace.
I wish that every church was like your church.
Thanks for being real!
What a great post. This is exactly what I needed to hear today!
i love you dude.
Amen Brother.
loving the transparency, never lose it
we are all fallen and need His grace the church's job is to show us how to do this
funny my grace is coming lately from the medical community and my family, at 29 and bi-polar spending four weeks in the last two months in the hospital, losing my job and moving back in with mom and dad for the first time since 19 I really feel God's grace at work through his people
just wondering if we all aren't supposed to love unconditionally the way parents should love children
THIS is why we love you! see you friday!
Great post los. Very transparent. I learned from you today.
Thanks
Man That was powerful dude. Awesome.
Thanks, I needed that.
Nice post, mr ragamuffin heart.
Great reminder for all of us!
Thx!
That is killer dude.
good stuff bro
You best blog post EVER…and a great lesson for those of us who have read it. Seriously…thank you!!!!
Amen. I concur with you whole heartedly