Comments on: Welcome To Church…Please Shut That Kid Up

By: Steve

Steve — Mon, 14 Dec 2009 21:20:12 +0000

If you actually look at what precedent is set within the bible, it becomes obvious that there was never any such thing as children church or even Sunday school. Everyone, young and old, nursing babes, as well as teens worshiped together.

Now i know that that is taboo in our “enlightened” age when we know more than the word of God does, and since parents have long abdicated their responsibility of actually raising their children to day cares, school teachers, or to whomever will give them their “me time”, it is quite impractical to just throw everyone together in a worship service without some expectations of orderliness. However, I believe that is precisely what churches should do.

Churches should not be in the business of entertaining…they should be in the business of glorifying God, and helping to reinforce parents God given, God directed responsibility if training up their children to be the next generation of Christians.

Age segregated sunday schools while originally well intentioned, were spawned straight out of evolutionary philosophy. The road to hell is paved with good intentions.

Parents, Pastors, and churches should be more concerned with the salvation of their children than with a few distractions and disruptions during a service.

In this disposable age, our children’s salvation should not be so carelessly discarded.

By: Chris Merritt

Chris Merritt — Sun, 11 Oct 2009 21:30:55 +0000

I am sooo glad my church (NewSpring) does not allow children into the service unless they are in middle school or older. Oven the messages are just way over their level and they can learn better in an environment that is suited to meet them on their level. And as a plus we are not disrupted by children crying and by those who are bored since the message is not on their level.

By: Gregg Hampton

Gregg Hampton — Sat, 19 Sep 2009 00:28:17 +0000

first i read the original post… read some of the comments, then read some of the comments here… so here i go.

i think its wrong to publicly embarrass someone, so i think the pastor was very wrong. he played his frustration out on a person under his care, not only by ‘calling her out’ but then by drawing more attention to it in the other services in what seems to be an attempt to ‘self-preserve’ or justify his actions.

the mother needed to be aware of her surroundings. she could have and probably should have moved to a less distracting area if the child was being loud, but the onus is still on the pastor. i can’t really imagine Jesus telling a woman sitting at the front of the crowd with a child with a rattle that she should take her kid to the back or something like that.

i imagine Jesus being redemptive in the moment. picking the child up and giving the child attention and continue teaching with the child, redirecting what was being said by what is actually happening. or even getting the child’s attention and beginning to speak the message directly to him or her in a way they would understand and the rest of the crowd would be inspired by.

some spoke of being aware of a “target” audience and making ‘rules’ based on that. i don’t know. i think anyone that is in the room is the target and that would include the kid and that would include the mother.

i think its incredible to develop opportunities for kids to worship and to find God and to encourage parents to take advantage of those things. but they are opportunities, not requirements. making it a rule stinks of the law.

a pastor being distracted and ‘preaching in anger’ or ‘in sin’ or whatever is just an indictment of their own heart. not necessarily of their salvation or their right to minister. challenges and unplanned bumps don’t make us who we are but show people who we really are. this pastor showed where his heart was and what he really wanted in that moment.

control.

he spent a lot of money and energy and time and etc etc on that children’s program and she didn’t take her kid in there so that he could be guaranteed an environment free of distractions so that he could preach the word of God that 98 percent of the people would forget and never talk about or think about again within 3 hours of leaving….

but his interaction with her will be remembered for years.

it may be the only thing many will ever remember specifically hearing him say. ever.

interesting.

its likely that our mistakes will be much more readily and easily remembered.

but again, i imagine Jesus redeeming, stepping into the moment, putting his arm around us when we say or do what wasn’t best, and redeeming…

because it is what He does and it is who He is.

By: mandy

mandy — Sun, 13 Sep 2009 16:45:57 +0000

As a mom – if my kid is in service w/ me I'm constantly at attention. They have to sit still, they need to be quiet, they need to get their finger out of their nose, they need a snack, they can't see, they need to keep their hands to themselves, they need to stop kicking the chair in front of them.

I'd never get to listen or worship. Some of us moms NEED that time to focus on God. It wouldn't work for me. But I certainly don't mind OTHER people's kids in service.

Not to mention, sometimes the service topic isn't kid friendly. I would rather have them in children's church where they are learning in a way that makes sense to them. And fellowshipping with their peers.

By: Michelle George

Michelle George — Sun, 13 Sep 2009 07:44:08 +0000

From a (former) worship leader's perspective, trying to create a worshipful atmosphere with no distractions…I don't have a probelm with kids in the congregation, but when a worship team member had kiddos climbing all over them, I had issues. From a mummy's perspective…and as a worship leader's perspective…I used to love catching my kid's eye and smiling…connecting as we worshipped together. From a person who's really struggling to understand how the body of Christ is really supposed to be as opposed to a series of traditions that we adhere to, and that I grew up with, and that aren't necessarily biblical….I have serious questions. I HAVE to know how Jesus' community is supposed to work! If He interupted time with his disciples to bring kids into the circle…what does that tell us about how our church family time together is supposed to be? There are so many paradoxes…..what is excellence? Is excellence making sure that we have great worship that is technically wonderful? Or is excellence making sure that our relationships with each other and God are built when we get together? Cant eh two co-exist? Sorry…I'm not much help…God has me on a wild adventure out of traditions at the moment

By: Cari

Cari — Sun, 13 Sep 2009 02:40:42 +0000

My thoughts and prayers are with the woman and her child from your original post, Los. My personal opinion is that the church needs to meet people where they are at. Sometimes that is with a fussy baby in church. My kids have routinely used the nursery at our very, very family friendly church. I understand that they can be disruptive. After my dad died, I needed my kids with me. Even if they weren't perfect in church…even if they fussed a bit. I needed the connection to my church family and my immediate earthly family – at the same time. The point I'm trying to make is that I don't think we can or should ignore that sometimes people who come to church need us to extend a fraction of the Grace that we receive from God every day, every mistake we make. We might only get one chance to share it.

By: kirk

kirk — Sat, 12 Sep 2009 18:08:04 +0000

In the general church environment with a schedule, a worship set and a sermon, I think it's fine to have children there, but if the child is disruptive, our of love and respect for the others in attendance a parent should remove the child from the service. Generally, a child being disruptive week after week is not something that occurs. If a child is always disruptive, there's something deeper at issue than this question. I believe the example of worship and witness is good for children and a positive influence. I've heard this best utilized in house and cell church models where the children are integrated into the service itself in several ways. I don't think you can make a hard and fast rule, but parents need to be mindful. If your child is disruptive, step outside, use childcare, a cry room, whatever… but put others before yourself. Think of what you are giving to the others in the congregation rather than what you are missing out on.

By: Kevin

Kevin — Sat, 12 Sep 2009 18:03:56 +0000

OK at a wedding? Nope.
OK at a beauty pageant? Nope.
OK in an "attachment" parent's workplace? Nope.
OK when it is MERELY the Word of God being proclaimed? Sure!

That makes no sense to me.

By: holly

holly — Sat, 12 Sep 2009 17:37:41 +0000

I think it was inappropriate for the pastor to embarrass that family in front of everyone. He may have done a lot of damage to that family in wanting to seek God. It would have been better to approach them in private to address the issue. In the other services, I would have been offended that he mentioned them again especially if I were in the same boat of having to bring my kids in. I also think it would have been better for the family to sit in the back and bring their child out if they were being disruptive. I think back to when my kids were that age, and especially if we were visiting a church, my kids would not go into the children's church b/c they were scared. I brought my kids in with me to the service and always sat in the back. If a family has to make a choice, wouldn't it be better to allow the family in to worship God than to stay at home b/c the kids won't go in children's church?

By: Annie

Annie — Sat, 12 Sep 2009 15:34:49 +0000

When i go to church I value the peace, quiet and humbleness of being with the Lord. We do have a cry room so the noise of children has tampered down. As a parent, of a once 2 year old who could not sit, I would quietly lead him out of the sanctuary and spend most of mass outside with him and God. Thus, those who stayed got the pleasure of not hearing my kid but rather the mass. Today, my child is now 15 and is able to behave himself, sometimes much better than some of the adults. The thing that bothers me most now is not the children but the adults who decide to have a conversation during communion, the most sacred part of the mass. I do so want to turn around and tell them, not very politely, to shut up or go outside. It seems there is no more respect for the sanctity and peace offered during mass. Sadly, I no longer attend mass as regularly as I should. But at least I am no longer frustrated when praying or being in peace with Christ.