Comments on: The Small Group Model…Is It Time For A Change? http://www.ragamuffinsoul.com/2009/12/small-groups-is-it-time-for-a-change/ Carlos Whittaker's Weblog Fri, 10 Feb 2012 08:05:38 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.1.3 By: Rich Butler http://www.ragamuffinsoul.com/2009/12/small-groups-is-it-time-for-a-change/#comment-324526 Rich Butler Thu, 24 Dec 2009 04:24:43 +0000 http://www.ragamuffinsoul.com/?p=9131#comment-324526 Community is rarely found when it's the goal! At least this is what I have found as a former "Connection's Pastor." World War II vets didn't go looking for community, they just shared the same mission and the byproduct was community. Community that lasted a lifetime! We have changed our structure from Home Groups to Seasonal Groups where we define the Mission and invite people from all walks of life to engage the mission to find community. It takes pressure off from becoming the church's e-harmony coordinator. This is not a covenant but rather an experiment that we have been trying for the last few years. Community is rarely found when it’s the goal! At least this is what I have found as a former “Connection’s Pastor.” World War II vets didn’t go looking for community, they just shared the same mission and the byproduct was community. Community that lasted a lifetime!

We have changed our structure from Home Groups to Seasonal Groups where we define the Mission and invite people from all walks of life to engage the mission to find community.

It takes pressure off from becoming the church’s e-harmony coordinator. This is not a covenant but rather an experiment that we have been trying for the last few years.

]]> By: Joanna http://www.ragamuffinsoul.com/2009/12/small-groups-is-it-time-for-a-change/#comment-321028 Joanna Sun, 13 Dec 2009 10:21:33 +0000 http://www.ragamuffinsoul.com/?p=9131#comment-321028 In my experience, the small groups that i've been in that haven't worked seem to have been from badly thought-out mixes of people being assigned to groups. If the people wouldn't naturally "click" due to really different temperaments/attitudes/life experience ect or due to a lack of social skills, it won't start working just because people have been thrown into a small group together. Being Christian is not usually on its own enough in common to make it work. I've been in groups where even after a year or more it still feels like a college tutorial (and a bad one at that) not a community. On the other hand I've been in well put together groups where I knew no-one before joining but after a few meetings people have clicked well together, feel they can be honest and enjoy spending time with each other outside meetings. In my experience, the small groups that i’ve been in that haven’t worked seem to have been from badly thought-out mixes of people being assigned to groups. If the people wouldn’t naturally “click” due to really different temperaments/attitudes/life experience ect or due to a lack of social skills, it won’t start working just because people have been thrown into a small group together. Being Christian is not usually on its own enough in common to make it work. I’ve been in groups where even after a year or more it still feels like a college tutorial (and a bad one at that) not a community. On the other hand I’ve been in well put together groups where I knew no-one before joining but after a few meetings people have clicked well together, feel they can be honest and enjoy spending time with each other outside meetings.

]]> By: aaron bird http://www.ragamuffinsoul.com/2009/12/small-groups-is-it-time-for-a-change/#comment-320298 aaron bird Fri, 11 Dec 2009 06:41:03 +0000 http://www.ragamuffinsoul.com/?p=9131#comment-320298 I resonate. Honestly, I'm bored with the study aspect. I find value in in intellectually, but that model is still too "classroom" for me, which means there's not enough time to get to know the others, especially if you're new to the group. Something different, one of our pastors started a "junto" (see wikipedia). Because we are all believers, the conversation naturally turns to spiritual things, more personal, more relational. Anyway, it's a format I think that could be worth expanding. a.bird I resonate. Honestly, I’m bored with the study aspect. I find value in in intellectually, but that model is still too “classroom” for me, which means there’s not enough time to get to know the others, especially if you’re new to the group. Something different, one of our pastors started a “junto” (see wikipedia). Because we are all believers, the conversation naturally turns to spiritual things, more personal, more relational.

Anyway, it’s a format I think that could be worth expanding.

a.bird

]]> By: LoriNelson http://www.ragamuffinsoul.com/2009/12/small-groups-is-it-time-for-a-change/#comment-320091 LoriNelson Thu, 10 Dec 2009 18:54:35 +0000 http://www.ragamuffinsoul.com/?p=9131#comment-320091 As the small groups pastor at our church, I ask this question regularly. I am a social person so making friends is not that difficult for me so I didn't start out building small groups so people can meet new friends. We do 3 types- Study: study a book or subject together. Social: build it around something you love to do like hiking, reading, fishing, etc. This summer I launched the 3rd type and they are SERVE. I went to organizations and ministries in our community and asked if we could partner with them. We go into the homeless shelters, a teen outreach center, retirement homes, a place that ministers to the families of prison inmates, etc. Then we asked the police department and parks department what we could do since they've had so many budget cuts. They were shocked that we wanted to just serve without anything attached. It's set our church on a new course to just SERVE! The reason I like our model is that you can do whatever feels comfortable. Right now I'm leading a parenting group for people who need a boost and they have had major parenting successes since it's started. This summer my husband and I led a group of 20 up Mt. St. Helens, most of them it was their first mountain they've ever climbed. Last month we cleaned up an totally overgrown park in our community. These have all accomplished exactly what I set out to accomplish and some have even brought new friends into my life as a great bonus! I think being comfortable with the fact that not everybody NEEDS to be in a small group is a huge step in the right direction. Also having very clear expectations of what you want out of them is another. As the small groups pastor at our church, I ask this question regularly. I am a social person so making friends is not that difficult for me so I didn’t start out building small groups so people can meet new friends. We do 3 types- Study: study a book or subject together. Social: build it around something you love to do like hiking, reading, fishing, etc. This summer I launched the 3rd type and they are SERVE. I went to organizations and ministries in our community and asked if we could partner with them. We go into the homeless shelters, a teen outreach center, retirement homes, a place that ministers to the families of prison inmates, etc. Then we asked the police department and parks department what we could do since they’ve had so many budget cuts. They were shocked that we wanted to just serve without anything attached. It’s set our church on a new course to just SERVE!
The reason I like our model is that you can do whatever feels comfortable. Right now I’m leading a parenting group for people who need a boost and they have had major parenting successes since it’s started. This summer my husband and I led a group of 20 up Mt. St. Helens, most of them it was their first mountain they’ve ever climbed. Last month we cleaned up an totally overgrown park in our community. These have all accomplished exactly what I set out to accomplish and some have even brought new friends into my life as a great bonus!
I think being comfortable with the fact that not everybody NEEDS to be in a small group is a huge step in the right direction. Also having very clear expectations of what you want out of them is another.

]]> By: kirk http://www.ragamuffinsoul.com/2009/12/small-groups-is-it-time-for-a-change/#comment-320062 kirk Thu, 10 Dec 2009 17:48:51 +0000 http://www.ragamuffinsoul.com/?p=9131#comment-320062 sorry wrong post sorry wrong post

]]> By: kirk http://www.ragamuffinsoul.com/2009/12/small-groups-is-it-time-for-a-change/#comment-320061 kirk Thu, 10 Dec 2009 17:48:23 +0000 http://www.ragamuffinsoul.com/?p=9131#comment-320061 rest... to trust Christ and live, letting Him fulfill the wants and desires that sometimes consume me if and as He wills... those desires for restoration of the relationship with a girl that still amazes me rest… to trust Christ and live, letting Him fulfill the wants and desires that sometimes consume me if and as He wills… those desires for restoration of the relationship with a girl that still amazes me

]]> By: kirk http://www.ragamuffinsoul.com/2009/12/small-groups-is-it-time-for-a-change/#comment-320059 kirk Thu, 10 Dec 2009 17:46:02 +0000 http://www.ragamuffinsoul.com/?p=9131#comment-320059 I think a small group should be a microcosm of the biblical church. I feel there is little depth where people are not serving together in the carrying out of the Great Commission. In order to grow together, they must engage the world together and that means more than just meeting together for bible study, food, accountability and the occasional service project. Interesting to think that it is an extension of other centered living that pours forth from the smaller corporate body as well as the individual. The inner life is knowing Jesus, the outer life is Christ manifest. From Jesus, to ourselves, to the group, to the world, together. I think a small group should be a microcosm of the biblical church. I feel there is little depth where people are not serving together in the carrying out of the Great Commission. In order to grow together, they must engage the world together and that means more than just meeting together for bible study, food, accountability and the occasional service project.

Interesting to think that it is an extension of other centered living that pours forth from the smaller corporate body as well as the individual. The inner life is knowing Jesus, the outer life is Christ manifest. From Jesus, to ourselves, to the group, to the world, together.

]]> By: Art http://www.ragamuffinsoul.com/2009/12/small-groups-is-it-time-for-a-change/#comment-319969 Art Thu, 10 Dec 2009 12:24:01 +0000 http://www.ragamuffinsoul.com/?p=9131#comment-319969 I agree with Natalie... small groups built around people who are already serving together is the best option. Holy huddles where we expose our deep dark secrets don't foster spiritual growth & community. They just give us an avenue to vent our frustrations and talk about how messed up our parents caused us to be. In our church our youth leadership team is the best small group I've seen, and we don't call it that. The people who make it up genuinely love and care for each other, and wouldn't think twice about "asking the hard questions." Community happens naturally without having to be forced. We keep in touch by text, phone calls and Facebook. Plus we serve side-by-side in the trenches of youth ministry every week. I agree with Natalie… small groups built around people who are already serving together is the best option. Holy huddles where we expose our deep dark secrets don’t foster spiritual growth & community. They just give us an avenue to vent our frustrations and talk about how messed up our parents caused us to be. In our church our youth leadership team is the best small group I’ve seen, and we don’t call it that. The people who make it up genuinely love and care for each other, and wouldn’t think twice about “asking the hard questions.” Community happens naturally without having to be forced. We keep in touch by text, phone calls and Facebook. Plus we serve side-by-side in the trenches of youth ministry every week.

]]> By: Natalie http://www.ragamuffinsoul.com/2009/12/small-groups-is-it-time-for-a-change/#comment-319854 Natalie Thu, 10 Dec 2009 04:43:13 +0000 http://www.ragamuffinsoul.com/?p=9131#comment-319854 My few cents: 1) I have helped to "organize" many "community groups" (nice wording eh?) and have seen a common pattern. A leader arises, probably coerced by the church staff/Pastors, and quickly finds themselves either a) having all their friends over once a week for dinner/discussion or b) miserably hosting a group of people they have no desire to spend time with. 2) I have led small groups where my husband and I have sat and been totally transparent and honest with our group members, trying to stir the dialogue and find meaningful conversation and depth and had others LIE to our face about their lives. Clearly this type of environment doesn't foster GENUINE relationships. 3) I have attended more than one group that was clearly a social standings based group (see point 1:A) based around "friends" of similar social status. When you are the only small business owner who is struggling to pay the bills, this is not that much fun. 4) The only "small groups" I've seen truly work are very fluid groups of people who are serving together and truly sharing life, typically born out of need. Perhaps if the church were willing to admit its neediness - more people would be willing to offer genuine community and true openness in response. My few cents:

1) I have helped to “organize” many “community groups” (nice wording eh?) and have seen a common pattern. A leader arises, probably coerced by the church staff/Pastors, and quickly finds themselves either a) having all their friends over once a week for dinner/discussion or b) miserably hosting a group of people they have no desire to spend time with.

2) I have led small groups where my husband and I have sat and been totally transparent and honest with our group members, trying to stir the dialogue and find meaningful conversation and depth and had others LIE to our face about their lives. Clearly this type of environment doesn’t foster GENUINE relationships.

3) I have attended more than one group that was clearly a social standings based group (see point 1:A) based around “friends” of similar social status. When you are the only small business owner who is struggling to pay the bills, this is not that much fun.

4) The only “small groups” I’ve seen truly work are very fluid groups of people who are serving together and truly sharing life, typically born out of need. Perhaps if the church were willing to admit its neediness – more people would be willing to offer genuine community and true openness in response.

]]> By: Carole Turner http://www.ragamuffinsoul.com/2009/12/small-groups-is-it-time-for-a-change/#comment-319731 Carole Turner Wed, 09 Dec 2009 17:51:03 +0000 http://www.ragamuffinsoul.com/?p=9131#comment-319731 Yes! Come visit. We can show you all around the Dream Center! You can stay with our family, we love company. Yes! Come visit. We can show you all around the Dream Center! You can stay with our family, we love company.

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