Joel Osteen And Jeff Henderson Are Up To Something
I was leading worship at Lakewood Church in Houston Texas. It was amazing. Standing in front of that many people worshiping the Lord together was overwhelming. I’ve been intrigued by Osteen for a long time. His story on how he transitioned that church from his fathers pastoring to his has always been inspiring to me.
I was playing the last song…and I remember thinking clearly…The brass sounds AMAZING!
At that moment I turned to see if Joel Osteen was coming up to pray us through the transition and instead of Joel Osteen it was Jeff Henderson.
Jeff looked at me and said…
“Sorry to do this to you Los”…
He stuck me in the neck with some needle.
When I fell to the ground I remember looking to the crowd and they all had Osteen’s face.
Then I blacked out.
I woke up in a cell with Rick Warren, The Pope, Mark Driscoll, and Rev Run.
Rick looked at me and said…”They got to you too huh?”, then started laughing with that deep laugh that he has.
I woke up again…this time for real…with my heart pounding through my chest.
I have no idea what the crap that dream was about, or meant, but I’m having lunch with Joel, I mean Jeff next week and I’m wearing a turtle neck.
And if Joel Osteen reads this…if you see Jeff Henderson in the building, call the FBI.
Any dream interpreters out there?
What was the last dream you had and what the crap does my dream mean?
Los
RAIN IT DOWN
1- Who is Jeff Henderson?
And B- I wouldn’t go anywhere near the Osteen.
~NickShoe
WOW, seems that we have a “huge” fan of Mr. Osteen, right Nick? o.O
not really. (couldn’t tell if u were being sarcastic)
Better make that a Kevlar turtle neck!
It sounds like you may need Jack Bauer some time in the future. Make sure you have him on speed dial.
My last dream was also about Jeff Henderson! How bizarre! He loaned me some money because I needed to have my car towed from Buckhead Church.
Last weird dream: this morning dreamed my unemployed friend, my daughter and I were at a conference to help us learn how to make money using the internet…my daughter is 25 now, but in my dream she was 6 years old. Then someone pelted us with pink glitter. Then I woke up. I will never really know what that means.
You will never really know what your dream means either. Get over it. And have a great day!
clearly joel is the antichrist. just ask any conservative evangelical christian.
i kid, i kid.
ps. joel & jeff kinda look like they could be brothers in those pictures. weird.
For real. That is true. They look like bros
Either you are super paranoid, want to have a sweet mullet, wishing you could pull off the “this is my bible…” speech from Osteen, or are predicting the future.
Take your pick
Pretty sure it means you spend too much time in church circles.
HAHA. Good one. Except I don’t anymore. I’m work from a bar now.
are you seriously working from a bar right now? envyyyyyy.
I was having a picnic lunch in California with an old high school classmate and her two pre-adolescent daughters when a huge missile came flying toward us out of the sky. We started running and the missile hit about 50 yards away from us. We found out that those missiles had hit all over the world, and the rest of the dream was just the four of us trying to protect ourselves from other survivors, make it through one day at at time, and make sure the girls had food. My family was nowhere in sight.
I prayed about whether or not this dream meant anything, and the Holy Spirit kept reminding me about it (which is weird because I can never remember anything about my dreams – this one is still very vivid). Anyhow, I contacted her via facebook and asked her what she thought about God and dreams. She asked me what my dream was about, and when I revealed it to her, the dream resounded deeply within her and ever since we’ve had some really good God conversations.
I hope I have more dreams like this if it lets me talk with people about God stuff.
You too can have dreams like this, like your heavenly father intended…..(ooops i forgot that doesnt work unless you hear my faux southern accent)
Haha, wow…
Mine was actually last night. I dreamed my youth group went on a mission trip to some orphanage. The orphanage had an obstacle ropes course type of thing. No one had ever beaten it in the history of the orphanage. Well, I beat it, and it ended in a room with a bed where I went to sleep. I woke up and was suddenly an orphan, no explination given. I spent the day as an orphan. I went to bed that night and woke up in the middle of a conversation with my senior pastor about his trip to China (yes, I was still asleep in real life, in my dream I woke up, my senior pastor has never been to China). He was telling me about how he nearly got caught by the Chinese authorities for spreading God’s word, but that someone had helped him out of the country. He was about the explain the long and fear-filled journey out when my alarm woke me up out of that very weird and confusing dream.
Heather,
Maybe you’re suppose to go to an orphanage, and maybe your pastor should go to China?
No way! I don’t think he should! I don’t think he should be allowed! That’s way too dangerous!
I think the dream means you secretly wish you had a mullet.
as much as i have loved your blog, i hope that joel is not your idol as your dream/post suggests… Jesus never taught “prosperity gospel” but the exact opposite. in fact if you do see joel, i hope he has wiped that cheesy grin off his face, lost the tie and was seen hanging out with [real] ragamuffins… just like Jesus did…
Idol?
Los, I am just going to say this very simply…
There are places that you CAN go with your gifts, and then there are places that you SHOULD go with your gifts. Continue to trust the ones that have invested tirelessly and selflessly in you to keep you accountable and going the directions you SHOULD go.
If you don’t you may find yourself in “time out” while you are getting your focus back. Anyone thats anyone has let “them” get to us. And only the ones that truly love us can get near enough to give us the antidote.
Thats all I got brother!
Wow. Good word.
i have, through years of experience and work, come to believe dreams are highly important to pay attention to. it appears to have been a strong dream for you, so i would encourage you to wrestle with this till you feel youve found an interpretation that fits well with you. and if you are serious about figuring it out ive got a couple book recommendations for you.
When you started out leading worship, did you have ambitions to be the the “big-dog” worship guy at a super-mega church like Lakewood?
Did Jeff’s influence in your life change that ambition?
The crowd at the church may be symbolic of the people there sharing a common perspective/view.
The people in the cell all seem to be people of great influence, yet all very diverse in theology and background. Being there with them could reflect how influential you are as well, and reflect a desire to come together with people regardless of their differences.
The fact that you are in a jail cell may reflect an anxiety about being such an influential person.
Just a shot in the dark.
disclaimer: I am not a psychologist, psychiatrist, therapist, psychic, or dream analyst. But I did stay at Holiday Inn Express not too long ago.
I’m not sure if you want a mullet but I’m going to agree with all the others who said that this is what your dream meant.
My last weird dream was a few nights ago. While it didn’t involve Joel Osteen or Jeff henderson, it did involve Chris Tomlin and Louie Giglio. I was dating Chris Tomlin and we were hanging out at some conference (I was just at Passion so I imagine it was that one). Louie was around but he looked like a cross between the real Louie Giglio and the military guy from Avatar complete with the claw scars in the side of his head and the bulging muscles. Louie was also considerably more aggressive than the Louie of reality. Chris was going through a bit of an identity crisis (looking for his purpose in life) that I was trying to support him in. And they were helping me move to a new home.
Chris Tomlin was a great boyfriend.
I don’t think I want to know what this dream means, if anything.
Wow. What a dream!
this would be my interpretation…take it for what its worthy….not much…
clearly watching the show Dexter is impacting you in some serious ways. the needle to the neck is such a classic “nice guy” serial killer move.
I don’t dream, but I’m pretty sure this just means that Jeff and Joel (Note the J’s…momma was thinkin) are twins, separated at birth and you’re the guy to bring them together. Get er done!
INTERPRETATION:
You need to quit your job at Buckhead and launch your own creative consulting ministry…
Just a thought.
No idea what your dream meant, but it was scary. I was just glad it wasn’t a dream, and you haven’t totally lost it.
I dreamed last night that our neighborhood was getting a bunch of new crappy restaurants – like a new Waffle House, with another crappy restaurant attached on the back of it – like a Popeye’s, even though we already have those places in our neighborhood. Weird. Now whenever I hear a bell, I have the unmistakable urge for fried chicken and maple syrup, while smoking menthol cigarettes.
Trust me I have had weirder dreams than that one time I was in heaven a drug addict came and stabbed me in the arm weird right
Let me get this straight. You are leading worship at Osteens church and totally diggin right? I mean who whouldn’t. It’s a pretty righteous gig. Jeff was at some point a mentor/friend? He cuts your dream by knocking you out with some kinda drug and you wake up in a cell with ppl I believe are the polar opposite of Osteen. You are in a cell with people who follow Christ. Real people.
So tell me — what do YOU think that means?
I personally think Joel is a heretic. Wealth and abundance preachers drive me nuts. I think Jeff (in the dream) is trying to save you from yourself. A warning maybe to keep it real – no matter how big you get. ;-D
I will add — whenever we dream – everyone in our dream represents a different piece of our psyche. If you can figure out what parts of you the characters represent, you’ll understand the dream.
That or you ate something spicy before dinner and it just messed you up.
I just realized that I basically said this, but took many more words to do so. :-/
Oh well… it’s better for it to be said twice than not at all!
Well….Brad Lomenick did post a couple weeks ago a prediction for 2010 that 2 mega churches would merge this year?
Did I read that right?
…I’m just sayin.
I posted a lengthy comment, but it’s not appearing. I don’t know if you have to approve comments of a certain length, or what’s going on…
I’m just glad you’re dreaming about me.
Jeff
Always.
Los-
I am going to be bold and give you the interpretation I feel God has given me for your dream-
You will be betrayed by someone who gave you an “assignment” or “opportunity”. The opportunity seems like the chance of a lifetime and you couldn’t believe it would be available to you, but it will fall thru or in the midst of your participation, something doesn’t seem “right.”
That’s what I got from God. If I get anything more, I will let you know. Please pray about this interpretation and see if it resonates in your Spirit.
Blessings
hahahah
Too many church circles for sure.
I have not interpretation. I need someone to interpret mine. I always have crazy dreams, almost nightly. I try to look things up on the internet, but they are so generic and really don’t make sense for my dreams.
Jessica,
People tend to get caught up in archetypes and attempt to interpret dreams from knowledge rather than discernment… be cautious with those who would claim to have authoritative interpretations naming themselves prophets. These people seek to make a name for themselves and are predators of the faith, preying on those who seek to understand the mysteries of God. While often dreams can fit with a simple archetypal interpretation. It is more often that after meditation and asking for discernment a more complete answer will come closer to the spiritual truth that you are seeking.
Needle in the Neck Interpretation
First let me explain something. When you dream of specific people, it does not necessarily mean the dream is about them personally. Usually the people represent something more general. Such is the case in this dream. Jeff and Joel are symbolic of popular Christian movements in our culture today.
In the dream you are leading worship in front of a vast congregation. The gifted musicians in the brass section temporarily captivated you. In real life this would be an awesome experience, no doubt. However, the Lord is not impressed by the number of musicians, or people in attendance. He is looking for sincerity. “But the time is coming—indeed it’s here now—when true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and in truth. The Father is looking for those who will worship him that way.” (John 4:23)
You were expecting Joel to come next and lead in prayer. However that isn’t what happened. Instead, Jeff came up with sinister motives. This is extremely significant. Many of us in our churches have unwittingly fallen into traditions of man. Even the most untraditional, unconventional congregations are surprised when they realize they have created traditions of their own. “They worship me in vain; their teachings are but rules taught by men. You have let go of the commands of God and are holding on to the traditions of men.” And he said to them: “You have a fine way of setting aside the commands of God in order to observe your own traditions! (Mark 7:7-9)
In the dream, praise and worship came first, and “traditionally” Joel would follow with prayer. However, something unimaginable happened. Jeff came up and stuck a needle in your neck. He was able to do this in front of many witnesses!
This is exactly how satan wins so many battles with the body of Christ. He knows, given enough time, most of us will fall asleep in our traditions. Then he uses our own gifts (weapons) from the Father against us. As we become overwhelmed by the talented musicians, and gifted speakers we begin to focus on them rather than on Jesus. While we’re enjoying the music and assuming we know what’s coming next, we’re unaware of enemy’s invasion of our camp.
We’re still soldiers in a mighty army. But we’ve allowed ourselves to become comfortable and have laid down our weapons. We forget that satan attends our church services. Therefore we aren’t armed and ready to defend.
Before you blacked out, the faces of everyone changed to Joel’s. Unfortunately even believers sometimes act as if they were created in the image and likeness of the current popular preacher, artist, worship leader etc. rather than that of God the Father, The Son, and the Holy Ghost. We must be diligent in keeping our eyes on Jesus. We must purposely seek the Giver of Gifts rather than just His gifts.
Finally, you ended up in jail with other Christian leaders of today’s culture. This part of the dream is where the Lord is showing you the enemy’s battle strategy. Satan already has many believers focused on man rather than God. If he can just cause the leaders to fall, (which he has done to so many) he knows many people will follow them all the way to the bottom. Some of these people will never lift their faces toward heaven again, and will eventually fall into the depths of hell.
Los,
This is an interpretation by a friend of mine that is very gifted in this area. I told her nothing of who you were, or where God is taking you. Take it as you will, but everything she has ever interpreted for me has been dead on. I pray a covering over you as you step forward in this next area of your walk, and I pray for an increase of discernment to watch for traps the enemy may be setting.
Blessings and Shalom.
Los,
What was the color tone of the dream? Was it dark or bright?
Don’t have an interpretation of this dream but the last strange dream I had I want to share in case anyone else is having these dreams. The Monday night before the earthquake hit Haiti on Tue. around 5pm. I dreamed about an earthquake. BUT, it was not south of me toward Haiti but north of me toward Memphis . It was as though I was hoovering over the map of the U.S. around Memphis looking at a big gap in the earth.
Only later when I did some research did I know about the New Madrid fault that is north of Memphis. Hmmm….
Here is my interpretation. You are worried/anxious/excited about meeting Joel Osteen. You have a desire to lead worship at Lakewood. (Please let me sing bgvs with you, that would be so awesome!) AND on the same night these things were on your mind, you watched “24″.
I cannot even begin to list all of the weird worship leading anxiety dreams I have had in my life. In retrospect most of them are funny. I will share my latest one when I see you at recreate if you’re there. It’s actually NOT funny! One time I dreamed I changed clothes and put on my pjs and fell asleep between services. I woke up and couldn’t find my clothes anywhere….
Your dream means some major shiznit is about to go dizown!
I had a weird dream this morning, too. Dreamed I was watching “bootylicious” music video and then was driving around the philippines in a motor tricycle trying to tweet about my experience.
Hey, if you guys are interested, there’s this thing called lucid dreaming where you essentially “realize you are dreaming” inside the dream, take control of it and basically do whatever you want (i.e. fly, ask someone a question, or even praying, which gets pretty intense). It’s a very cool experience and useful for stuff like this. I would do a google search for stuff on it; my favorite site on the subject is lucidipedia.com. They have like online dream journals where you can choose to share your dreams and have other people on the site analyze them n’ such.
Just a thought.