Worship Leaders…Stop Leading In Front Of And Start Leading Beside Of
I remember a Sunday at Sandals when JC’s Girls had had an outreach the night before. JC’s Girls was an outreach my wife was a part of to the sex industry/strippers/porn stars/ect. of Los Angeles. I remember walking up to the mic…starting the song…looking down…
Breasts…
Cleavage…
Legs…
All over the first 2 rows. Scattered like confetti.
Apparently the outreach was a smashing success.
And suddenly I forgot every word to the first song we sang.
“Look up”, I thought.
“Just look up”.
Every trick from Every Man’s Battle I’d learned was not working.
Bouncing…um no. Wasn’t working.
I battled through the set and went back to the locker room (a poor church’s green room) defeated.
I’d just thought about breasts and God for an entire worship set.
Stick a fork in me…I was done.
Then after the service Heather (mi hesposa) introduced me to one of the girls.
I can’t remember her name but I remember her story.
And I remember the humanity in her voice.
And at that moment I realized that it was not just on successful JC’s Girls Sunday morning I had had trouble connecting with my church.
It was every Sunday morning.
You see there is a story behind every person who walks into your service.
And to 99% of them…you are just a guy or girl on a mic with a lot more energy than they have or ever want to have on a Sunday morning.
I remember making a conscious effort beginning the next Sunday to be in the crowd before and after every set.
30 minutes before I got on stage I would walk the aisles of the gym and meet every single person that was sitting there. I heard stories of greatness and sadness. Stories of hope and despair.
When I took the stage 2 things happened.
1. I was more than the hyper bald brown guy on stage. I was Carlos and there was a shrinking of the gap between them and I that I never knew existed. The more Sundays I did this the smaller the gap became.
2. They were more than just the lady who cried during every song, the guy who keeps his hands in his pocket during every song and could care less, the stripper with the WAY too tight clothes on…or off, the couple who makes out during every worship song.
They became the lady whose son died a year before, the guy who tells all his friends how amazing our band is, the girl who is working at Ralphs grocery store in the am and stripping in the pm to feed her 2 kids, and the make out couple…well they just love to make out.
Stories…they make our world spin. And those people in front of you, each and every Sunday, they are full of them. They are waiting for you to hear them so that when they start crying on that bridge of that song each and every week…you will know why.
Get out from in front of the people and get beside them…
You’re worship leadership will explode.
Trust me.
Los
RAIN IT DOWN
Honest, encouraging and beautiful. Continue pointing others to our awesome God.
I’ll try. As flawed as I am, at least it’s good to know it.
Thanks for the openness and honesty Los! An awesome word to every one involved in ministry not just worship leaders. I am reposting now…
Go right ahead.
Awesome. Our church is still small and it’s not hard to do this, but as we grow it’s going to get harder. Great reminder. Thanks Los.
It’s even hard in a small church.
Agreed, it’s hard even in a small church! I kick myself for not doing this EVERY SINGLE SUNDAY! We have 50 “official members” and an attendance of about 250. There are still way too many stories I don’t know and even worse haven’t taken the time to get to hear.
Carlos,
Very moving and so true. Wish more leaders would catch this attitude. Thanks for sharing.
You’re Welcome
Thanks for this man. I’m getting ready to take on the awesome responsibility of leading worship in a new church plant and this is how I am going to start it. Thanks for the story.
Leading at a church plant? Me too. Its a lot different than the other (larger) churches I’ve been a part of, but VERY cool. There is no hiding behind production.
Soooo much better to start it that way then have to fix it later. Good luck!!!
Your honest is once again awesome. The same goes for us in the crowd. By walking the crowd, those in the crowd understand that you care about them. That is is more than a position to you.
Leaders change things when they connect with the crowd, and the stories that are there.
Amen. Thanks for sharing.
Great thought Carlos.
The separation and “hero” status of worship leader / musicians is one of the main things I try to fight in the communities I am a part of. You have a platform, and that can tend to lead to an us and them mentality, but that is a battle worth fighting for sure.
I wonder if some the aesthetics of the modern worship movement (lights, fog, cool clothes, HUGE rock music) can also lead to this sense of division.
Any thoughts?
In any case, we MUST be among the people to truly love them.
I don’t think they get in the way if the one in the lights is truly authentic in their leading. That is more of a preference thing I think.
Good thoughts!!!
Great call. As I think about it, I’ve seen plenty of guys (with no lights or fog machines) playing wanky renditions of Tomlin tunes with MASSIVE egos.
Authenticity and a heart for the one serve goes a long way.
your insights into leadership in worship was really fitting and they are something i want to pass on to other members of my team. thanks!
Pass on!
great great great post. i agree with @vanessa very very encouraging! thanks for the thoughtful reminder about “being” with people instead of continually thinking about what’s ahead of us. thanks for this!!
You’re welcome Dane!
Love it.
One thing I try to consciously do as I lead worship is make eye contact with at least 10 people during a set. I’m an eye-closer, so it forces me to keep the ‘us’ – corporate worship – mentality. It’s not just me connecting with the Maker of the universe, it’s “us.”
Yup. Yup.
Long time lurker here, This is the kind of thing I love about your Blog…honesty and transparency not just about “right” and churchy things, but the willingness to say youre as flawed, troubled, torn as everyone else. Thanks for some good advice, keep up the good work!
Thanks Wood for sneaking out for a second.
Appreciate your words. And yes. Flawed as they come.
This is the best post I’ve ever read from you. Mingling with people before and after worship; y-e-s.
Thanks Anna!
los, this was an awesome post! thanks for sharing! it’s so true!!!
Yea Ben. Gotta get off the stage.
I think this applies not just to worship leadership but to leadership in general, and in my case, it applies to leading volunteers. Gotta really know the story to help lead them authentically.
So true Amanda. Even online!!!
Great advice brosef. This is also very helpful if you’re in a blended worship environment. People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care right? ok… that was straight cheddah.. but it’s true. I am in said situation now, and thought some people don’t like where the pastor has chosen to take the direction of our style, many are still hanging in there and making transitions because of relationships and because they see me as a caring real person rather than the guy that makes my ears bleed with the Satanic music coming from his axe.
GREAT perspective Bryan
I needed that reminder. Thanks Los.
I keep on praying for you. And God keeps using you. Thanks.
Tears!!! That was amazing!
That is something that I really struggle with. why is it that I cant be taken out of my comforts and listen to other peoples Great stories
Loved every word!! For that reason alone I think every green room in the church should be destroyed! I know there is probably a place for them…but too many people gig on Sundays and i think it is time for worship leaders and musicians to stop “gigging” on Sundays and care for the people they are serving.
I’m going to encourage my team right now and give them this charge “Find the Story!”
Carlos…thanks for leading that charge!!
“stop ‘gigging’ on Sundays” – love that!
Good stuff from a fellow Portlander. Enough with the gigging, no joke.
Being a worship leader in a church can definitely give you a rock star status, even if its only to a 100 people (especially if you’re good at what you do).
I remember a time when the only off-stage interaction I had with the people was when they were complementing me. It’s so easy to be about having your ego inflated. Then it becomes about you, and what you feel and it’s easy to justify giving less than your best because you don’t feel like it.
It makes a huge difference when you begin to see people as more than an audience – when you have a personal and emotional connection.
So true man. Our churchplant is just over 100 right now and I often times catch myself getting into that rockstar feel. I realize that I rarely do take time interact with and get to know people before or after the service. Its mostly just small talk the good ol’ “good job today” kinda thing.
“I’d just thought about breasts and God for an entire worship set.”
Thank you, thank you, thank you for being so REAL!
*slow clap*
Thanks for that, bro! Just moved to a new church with different people. This’ll help me get started right.
Connection isn’t just about connecting people to God. It’s about connecting them to yourself AND to God.
Great post!
thank you for reminding me that people in leadership roles in the church struggle with the same things i do. i think we tend to put you guys on a pedestal, which does you a disservice. it doesn’t allow you to have faults so that when you do struggle with these issues we think less of you because youre “supposed” to be the “good one”. thanks for reminding me that you are human
I heard God say the same thing to me a few months back, Los. It was difficult to deal with the fact that I really suck at remembering the 2000+ names of the people in my church, but I knew I had to get down off that stinkin platform and rub elbows with the people rather than gaze over their heads with no sympathy for how difficult my demands for them to “rejoice in the Lord” always could be for some of them. I still keep encouraging them to worship, but now I have faith that works by LOVE because it has been ignited by His compassion. Sometimes I’m scrambling to get my guitar re-tuned and my mind back on track for the other services that happen immediately one after another, but it’s been a great trade-off to put my agenda aside and let God shake me from my comforts. Great post, man. Amen to the maximum. You’re one anointed ragamuffin
Your honesty astounds me.
I’m a worship drummer, and I really have to thank you for this. Often times i struggle when the congregation doesn’t “get into it”, yet i never took into consideration
that i don’t know their stories. At least, a lot of them.
Thanks Los.
Great advise!!! I attended a mega church (embrassed to say) for years and the majority of the LEADERS never came to the congeration. They sayed in a nice pastor room with food and their chosen few besided them, then appeared to feed us our morsel of food with their presence, and we were happy to get their crumbs. I am still angry as you can tell over this why – did I stay.
Thanks for the reminder. My Pastor forwarded this post to me. I’m the Musical Director at our church and I can honestly say that I know MANY people by name, however I don’t know their story. I’d rather connect to people by their stories rather than by their name. Their name simply identifies them, but their story is their testimony. I’m determined to learn more stories this Sunday. Thanks Los!
B
Great word. And I really appreciated the times I attended Buckhead church and you were out after the services meeting people. Great example.
Thanks, Los, for another great word. I was just listening to a podcast yesterday by Kim Walker (Jesus Culture) talking about not forgetting the people. This goes right along with it!!
Also, I want to ask this community for prayer. I’m a worship leader and missionary in Mexico. Two weeks ago I woke up from a Sunday afternoon nap (after maybe our most powerful time of worship ever) completely deaf in my right ear. It’s totally throwing me off. I may never hear again. I can’t do music right now. Just pray for my healing, ok?
Praying for you Jan!!
I think that’s an awesome reminder for everyone, not just those leading worship. It’s about the relationships, not about where you’re going. It’s important to really connect to the people you are ministering to, not just preach at them. Thanks for sharing.
I couldn’t agree with you more..
Just testing things out!
Hey thanks for putting this on here Carlos. I have a problem with worrying about perfecting the music so much that sometimes I don’t spend any time before the service talking to people. I am in there meditating or talking to one of the band members or something else that isn’t a huge deal. This is such a huge thing for me to learn!!
Great reminder..we are all on a journey, some of us happen to be in darker places than others and we are serving, loving and ministering to the sick..for that is who Jesus came to save!
Amen, amen, amen, amen. My worship to God seems sometimes, but not always, to correlate directly to whether we are worshipping together with the musicians or whether I feel I’m watching a performance. My worship leader is a master, master, master at worshipping WITH!! Thank God for him! And please God more worship leaders get this – thank you Carlos!!
Thank you for your blog. It has provided great insight to me as a young (both in age and experience) worship leader. I appreciate the honesty of your approach so much and I pray that God continues to use you and your life to mentor to worship leaders and Christians around the world. Thanks again for the encouragement to get out from behind the microphone and be real with the people that we are worshiping with. Shine On.
Wow I never thought about that. So far I have played in places where I know the majority of the people. But for the past few months I started playing at an open mic night at a local cafe. I’ve been meeting a few people, but I know I can talk with more. It’s not a worship service, but it’s a good place to share stories and start God conversations.
Wow. Just stumbled across your music/blog thanks to your recent collaboration w/ the Shanes (huge fan). Thank you for this post-it is so real. I needed this encouragement to lead beside the people in my church as well. Thanks for this-a lot.
We actually used your “God of Second Chances video w/ Danny” last Sunday in church to help setup Acts 16…fantastic.
Oh, and have a blast touring with the Shanes! Looking forward to future posts.