Happy Birthday Son
Today Dae Seok turns 4.
Today I am Thankful for Dae Seok’s (Losiah’s) mother.
I wrote this 3 years ago last night…The eve of Losiah’s birthday…
I wonder if she was alone. Last year. Tonight. Was she alone? Right now. Tonight. Is she alone? Was she surrounded by family? Was she still debating life as a single mother in a land where they do not exist? Was her heart already broken? Was she in a hospital? Was she in lots of pain? Did someone drive her to the hospital? Did she spend much time with Dae-Seok? Did she get to feel him? Did she get to feed him? Did she change his diaper? How much did she cry? Is she crying right now? Did she want to change her mind? Did she change her mind? Does she wish she changed her mind?
These are the things running through my dome right now. As I sit here typing, Losiah is down the hall sleeping, dreaming of only God knows what. Probably about the dress his sisters put him in tonight. But me? I can only think of her. Of a mother that I will never know. Of a woman who made a decision that has forever changed the core of my existence. And hers. She will never hear the depths to which the laughter rises out of Sohaila when Losiah chases her. She will never see the care gleaming from Seanna’s eyes as she sprints across the room to catch him before he falls. She will never know the breath of life she has breathed into my family to make it complete, by making a choice to make her life incomplete.
A year ago tonight, I blogged this…”If I haven’t said it in a while. My wife is the most selfless person I know.” And that is true.
But little did I know, across thousands of miles of earth and ocean, was another selfless soul getting ready to sacrifice a bond that I will never understand…
For this soul of a calloused, hollow man.
Los
4 Years ago today, Losiah was born…6 months before this fight…
[If you are an impatient Ragamuffin skip to 11:44 in the video to see us meet Losiah for the first time, but you'll miss a great fight]
And today, I thank her again, for being brave enough to do what she did, so I can do what I did, and my son do what he does.
Happy Birthday kid.
Dad.
RAIN IT DOWN
hard to believe that video was 3.5 years ago. time flies when you’re having fun, eh? it’s been a privilege to follow the whittaker journey & watch that absolutely adorable little boy grow up. happy birthday Losiah!!
Happy Birthday! Now he’s famous!
@Chris – dude was already famous. That kid has talent!
–Terrace Crawford
http://www.terracecrawford.com
http://www.twitter.com/terracecrawford
Happy Birthday Losiah!
What JOY!!!..thanks for sharing..and HAPPY BIRTHDAY LOSIAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i watched this before… it was so lovely to “rediscover” it today. God bless!!
Can you input sound on the two parts that have none?
I’m crying like a baby watching this video….Happy Birthday Losiah!
Awesome
…Could you tell me the name of the song at the end of the video?
What a beautiful gift you have made for your son. As an adopted kid myself, I know that someday this video will be precious to him.
Happy birthday, Losiah! You have amazing parents!
P.S. Your “fight” reminds me of my husband and me- it’s just a spat to many people. Big fights really don’t happen too many times. Good for you for keeping it real and leaving it in the video! And the teacher in me has to tell you that on the Bible verse you quoted, I think “vein” is supposed to be spelled “vain”.
i love your family
Happy birthday Losiah! Love the video and blog entry today! It touched me because I was also adopted from Korea 30 years ago. I’ve watched your entire adoption video and cried many times. They are so sweet and raw with so many emotions. I know your son will cherish these memories and will be able to share them with his future wife and children one day. You have a wonderful family!
What a touching story and a sweet love of a little boy. I have never seen the moment when adopted parents meet their new little one before, and it was soo, soo wonderful! That little boy will always know how much he was wanted!
Happy Birthday Losiah!
Happy Birthday Losiah! So happy for you and your family Carlos. By the way, I know you know this, but Heather is beautiful!
Happy Birthday Losiah! Carlos, your videos and journey are beautiful. My husband was on the fence about adoption last year and watching your videos and reading your blog gave him the confidence that he could do it too. Our family is so grateful! We hope to have our son home next year
Thanks so much for sharing with us
Happy Birthday Losiah! Your dad may be a “horrible father”, but you’re blessed to have 4 years with a mom and dad who aren’t afraid to mess up, and who love you big time!
Happy Birthday Losiah!!! I hope your new fame is something you decide to share with with you dad.
What a blessing. Happy Birthday, Losiah! Thank you, Whittaker’s, for being Christ-like examples to the rest of us.
Happy Birthday beautiful boy! God bless you with great revelation of Jesus and the ability to love others the way He loves you.
Happy Birthday Losiah! Hope Beyonce calls you and thanks you for singing her song. Keep rockin homie!
Man, that kid was (and is) SO freakin’ cute, it makes me ill! (In a good way). Happy Birthday, Losiah!
Happy Birthday, Losiah.. It is wonderful to watch you grow up with so many wonderful blessings, and how your family is such an amazing testimony for Christ’s love.
Happy Birthday Losiah! Are you going to have a “Single Lady” themed party?
Happy Birthday Little Los!
happy birthday lil superstar!
You guys are an inspiration. Thanks for the email reply about adoption!
Happy Birthday, Dae Seok!!
I’m Korean myself. Although I am not adopted, I have had many Korean friends who were adopted and I used to translate letters from their mothers for them. I considered it a privilege to have friends who would hand me with trust those old letters from decades ago so I can translate and, hopefully, it touched their heart. You and your family are so precious!
Wish we could have been close friends! (:
Thank you for sharing your stories, I love your family!
Thanks for posting this Carlos – I watched the whole thing actually. I’m fairly new to your blog so I feel like I know you and your beautiful little family a little better now. Happy birthday to your little man Losiah!
Remembering watching all of the videos once before- loved seeing this again. Cry everytime the Lord brings a family together! Who knew he would be a Youtube sensation one day.
I remember watching this and crying. Happy Birthday, Losiah!
i love this. everything about it. the love letter filled with heaps of gratitude to a woman you never knew and the love poured out to your sweet sweet boy. you have a beautiful. family. completed by this precious gift. happy birthday little guy.
Happy Birthday, Losiah!!
Carlos, three of my dearest childhood friends (triplets born in 1958) were adopted from Korea. You can see a short two-part video of their story here: http://www.strattondvimaging.net/id1.html Your earlier post made me think about this…wondering about Losiah’s birth mother. They just turned 52. Our current mission pastor (he was at Velocity with us & will be going out to plant a church when he leaves us) and his wife adopted a son from Korea last year…his name is Josiah, and he just turned 2.
It’s a small world after all,
Bonita
Happy birthday Losiah!
thanks for letting us be apart. Happy Birthday Buddy!
Happy birthday Losiah!
Wow.. that entry makes you think. I want to know the answers… I wonder about this woman and I just stumbled across your blog this week. I couldn’t imagine being his PARENTS and having these lingering questions in my mind at each birthday, anniversiary of his adoption or milestone in his life. I’m so glad that I did stumbple across this lovely blog.
Hey Carlos, we haven’t met but I’m really good friends with the Stevens’ and have heard lots about you & Heather. Then a friend (unconnected!) showed me your Single Ladies video this weekend. So I stumbled on your blog this afternoon and read this post. My hubby and I are in the adoption process right now (2 little ones from Ethiopia) and this post was amazing! I’m gonna link my blog to your post. Beautiful!!!
I definitely teared up at the point in the video when you first met Losiah. Wow.
Everyday I become more and more convinced that adoption is something my husband and I need to do.
I remember crying when I saw it the first time and here I go again! Happy Birthday Losiah!
As Omma to 2 beautiful Korean children by adoption, I understand the feelings you expressed so well. Every birthday, I think the same things. And I pray…pray that she knows how happy we all are, and that her child is safe, happy and loved. God does amazing work, and puts families together the way He chooses. What a blessing our children are to us!
Blessings, and Happy Birthday little guy!
Mary Anne
mom to Soo Ho(now Jack) 9yrs
and Seh Hyang(now Sarah) 8 yrs
both sent home to us by God with the help of the angels at Holt International
I had forgotten that the first time you saw him, he was chewing on his fingers….perfect.
You are far from a horrible father (pertaining to your now famous youtube video). I’m amazed at what the human heart can do to change lives forever.
God bless Mr. Whittaker.
Do you ever wonder whether you children might not want to be publicized this way? It is great to have recollections of their childhood, but do you feel like they may regret this in their adulthood? At school? In college? In life?
If not, then it’s wonderful that you do this, but it seems like Losiah isn’t old enough, and still isn’t old enough to voice objections, as well as your other two children.
If he ever voices an objection, then I stop. I ask my girls and when they say when… they say when… and I stop
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU BEAUTIFUL BOY.
I just found you and I am also an adoptive parent. My husband and I have 4 kids from Korea and 1 birth child. I thank God on a regular basis for my kid’s birth mothers. I cannot fathom me doing what they were able to do. They are such special women that the well being of their children was more important than their own loss. I am in awe of them and forever thankful.
WOW!! What an amazing story:)) It is so refreshing to see something good going on in this world, because we mostly hear about the bad/negative actions of others.
I am writing a paper for my Theology class @ Xavier U. here in Cincinnati, OH on Interracial Adoption. I was researching the subject when I found your story. Again Amazing!!
I applaud you and your spouse. Keep doing what you are doing as parents, your children will pass it on to their children and so on, keeping the legacy of great parenting alive! So many of our youth today don’t get it and desperately need it. Again I applaud U & wish your family all the blessings GOD has to offer:))
Very touching. Your family is amazing. This was so touching and gave me chills (in a good way). Thank you so much for making an amazing change in a child’s life.
I am forever indebted to you for this ionfrmiaton.
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